the key to crystals ᵇʸ ˢᵃʳᵃʰ ᵇᵃʳᵗˡᵉᵗᵗ
hey guys do you ever wonder how that guy that Griffin named Kravitz after feels about him being taako’s boyfriend who he tried seducing with tentacles in his introduction episode
Like, literary analysis for the purpose of teaching critical thinking is one of the few forms of standard education that isn’t inherently didactic alongside, I’d argue, algebra as a way of teaching how to conceptualize interactions between data points, and of course those are the two things people keep making memes about how absurd or useless they are in “real life” while there’s shit you were taught in freshman Biology that is just, like, straight up not even true anymore, but it’s apparently sacrosanct and immutable.
Does it really surprise anyone that Tumblr is hostile to critical thinking?
Here’s the problem- sure, literary analysis is supposed to teach you critical thinking, but more often than not what students are generally learning in lit classes is brownnosing.
Let’s say you have a teacher called Ms. T who is teaching a unit on Kafka. Ms. T has decided that the Theme Of Kafka’s Metamorphosis is Man’s Alienation In The Postwar World. She teaches this as immutable fact. You are taught that the Giant Insect represents something, the apple the doctor throws at Gregor represents something else, and so on and so on.
If you’re in Ms. T’s class and you say “wait a minute, Kafka was disabled, what if Metamorphosis is about Kafka’s personal feelings of self-loathing at needing a caretaker?”, there’s a good chance you will get shot down. You’ll have to take a test with multiple-choice (!) questions about what such-and-such represents where if you don’t spit out the correct answer you’ll fail, and your essay will graded based on whether or not you successfully present the interpretation that Metamorphosis Is About Man’s Alienation In The Postwar World.
So you wind up in this situation where the goal of literary analysis is not to think critically about a work or use rhetoric to convince your reader that your interpretation has a leg to stand on. It’s to cherrypick the text for details that support someone else’s interpretation and then convince that someone that you agree with them. Which… can be a useful skill in real life, yes, but only in the sense that the world is full of petty tyrants and often you need to know how to placate them while you furiously update your resume.
If you’ve only had teachers like Ms. T- teachers who insist that their interpretation of the text is the True Interpretation, who insist that every Symbol in the text has a one-to-one Meaning that lines up with their preferred interpretation, and who punish you for showing original thought- literary analysis is going to seem like pointless bullshit, because the version you’ve been taught is pointless bullshit.
I agree with the general point here, but
…You’ll have to take a test with multiple-choice (!) questions about what such-and-such represents…
The US educational system has changed drastically since I went through it if English classes are using multiple choice tests now.
So none of you get that being forced to submit to the absurd whims of a faceless authority – not even being allowed to appeal to the simple facts – such as the fact that The Metamorphosis was written in 1912, and therefore can’t be about postwar anything – hopelessly answering an examination in which all answers are wrong – going through the motions in order to attain a goal that is meaningless in itself in any event – is in fact the best possible introduction to Kafka?
Way to go, Ms. T.
the fight is harder each year.
gotta keep going because nothing ever stops.
you deserve to be new and whole.
More legal shenanigans for your D&D setting:
- The Kingdom of Zor has historically been marked by a particularly virulent strain of human supremacism. Though that era has largely passed, its legacy has proven to be so deeply entrenched in the realm’s codes of law that later reformers found it expedient simply to expand the legal definition of “human”. So it is that in the land of Zor, an elf, an animated skeleton, and a sapient protoplasmic ooze are all Human in the eyes of the law – though strangely, the legal compass of humanity continues to this day to exclude bards.
- The Norgian Confederacy is infamous for its curiously inverted sumptuary laws. Being theoretically egalitarian, and priding themselves on principles of absolute social mobility, a Norgian’s manner of dress is in no wise restricted by their social station; rather, by dressing in the legally recognised manner of a particular station, they declare their membership in it. Strictly speaking these rules apply only to citizens; all the same, visitors whose outfits fail to match their preferred level of social obligation are advised to clearly advertise their foreign status, lest one be accused of dereliction of duty!
- Compounded by centuries of case law and precedent, the laws of the dwarven realm of Underhome have become a muddled mess with respect to the property rights of the dead. Some rights – particularly the ownership of one’s own remains – persist after death, while others transfer to designated heirs, and still others are held in trust should the deceased later join the ranks of the undead. In the halls of royalty, the ghosts of ancient kings and queens litigate endlessly with their living descendants for dominion over the earth’s riches; these revenant monarchs – or “mineral wights”, as they’re sometimes known – stand as the greatest obstacle to Underhome’s continued prosperity.
- The elvish principality of Greenwood keeps no prisoners, instead favouring a robust program of community service for the correction and rehabilitation of criminals. Their court system does not discriminate among species: animals as well as elves are often seen serving out sentences for the bewildering variety of petty misdemeanours that characterise elvish law. If necessary, the courts will grant a convicted animal the intelligence to understand and carry out its service; not all choose to go back to being ordinary beasts when the task is done (though many do), and so the Greenwood is home to a growing population of sapient animals with criminal records.
- One of the greatest peculiarities of Ulthar – already a peculiar land by any standards! – is that its banking sector consists primarily of the disembodied dead. Rather than being anchored to physical objects, ghosts are induced to “haunt” financial instruments – trusts, investment portfolios, and so forth – and thereby become responsible for them. Though these spectres are incapable of shirking their fiduciary duties, caution must still be exercised: their loyalty is to the financial instrument itself, not to its living beneficiaries. More than one investor has learned the hard way that their ghostly advisor will quite happily harm their non-monetary interests in order to increase their wealth.
My favorite moment when playing FFXIV for the first time was seeing the men in the same ridiculous subligars as the women.
In order:
World of Warcraft
Dark Souls
Final Fantasy XIV
Seriously, Dark Souls is so good about this, I accidentally became female and didn’t even know about it until I was changing my gear.
Sorry, that last bit is funny to me because I’m just imagining this knight changing and looking at a pair of breasts like “…Those are new.”
THE LAST COMMENT KILLED ME
Level 1: Prophecy proclaims that no man can kill villain; killed by woman.
Level 2: Prophecy proclaims that no weapon can harm villain; pushed down stairs and dies.
Level 3: Prophecy proclaims that villain will be brought low by no mortal hand; kicked to death by angry mob.
Level 4: Prophecy proclaims that no power on Earth shall be villain’s undoing; fatally distracted by sun in eyes.
Level 5: Prophecy proclaims that only power of laughter can defeat villain; beat up by clown.
Level **: Prophecy claims that villain cannot be killed by man nor beast, at day or night, or inside or outside. He is killed in a doorway at sunset by a half-man, half-lion
(this is actual Hindu myth)
Level ???: Prophecy claims that hero cannot be killed during the day or night, nor indoors or outdoors, neither riding nor walking, not clothed and not naked, nor by any weapon lawfully made. He is killed at dusk, wrapped in a net with one foot on a cauldron and one on a goat and with a spear forged for a year during the hours when everyone is at mass.
(actual Welsh myth!)
what i’m getting from this is that rules-lawyering is an ancient and honorable tradition
Liminal spaces, ya’ll.
Rations for various RPG Races
[[ Source. Original creator: wats6831. Additional information and images linked under each one. ]]
Universal:
Homemade artisan herb bread, home grown and dried apples and prunes, uncured beef sausage, munster cheese. Made a small bag from cheesecloth and tied it closed.
Discussion thread here.
Dwarf:
Garlic chicken livers, smoked and peppered cheese, spiced pork sausages, hard tack, dried vegetables, dried wild mushrooms.
Discussion thread here.
Elf:
Top left to right: Evereskan Honey Comb, Elven Travel Bread (Amaretto Liquer Cake with custom swirls), Lurien Spring Cheese (goat cheese with garlic, salt, spices and shallots), Delimbyr Vale Smoked Silverfin (Salmon), Honey Spiced Lichen (Kale Chips), and Silverwood Pine Nuts.
Discussion thread here.
Halfling:
From upper left: “Honeytack” Hard tack honey cakes, beef sausage, pork sausage mini links, mini whole wheat toast, cranberry cheddar cheese mini wedge, mini pickles, pumpkin and sunflower seeds, lower right is my homemade “travel cake” muesli with raisins, golden prunes, honey, eggs and cream.
Discussion thread here.
Half-Orc:
Wrapped in cheesecloth and tied in burlap package. Forest strider drumsticks, molasses sweet wheat bread “black strap”, aged Munster, hard boiled eggs, mixed wild nuts.
Discussion thread here.
Orc:
Orcs aren’t known for their great cuisine. Orcs prefer foods that are readily available (whatever can be had by raiding), and portable with little preparation, though they have a few racial delicacies. Toughs strips of lean meat, bones scavenged from recent kills, and dark coarse bread make up the bulk of common orc rations.Fire roasted rothe femur (marrow is a rare treat) [beef femur], Strips of dried meat (of unknown origin) [homemade goose jerky], foraged nuts, only edible by orcs….nut cracker tusks [brazil nuts], coarse black bread, made with whatever grains can be pillaged [black sesame bread], Pungent peppers [Habanero peppers stuffed with smoked fish and olives].
More images here. Discussion thread here.
Gnome:
Pan fried Delimbyr smelt, spiced goat cheese (paprika crusted hand pressed Fontina), Gnome shortbread (savory pistachio), glass travel jar filled with Secomber Red (wine), hard boiled quail eggs packed in rolled oats (to keep safe), dried figs from Calimshan, and Southwood smoked goat sausage (blood sausage).
More images here. Discussion thread here.
Lizardfolk:
Lizardfolk are known to be omnivores, forage for a surprising variety of foods found within the confines of their marshy environs, in this case the Lizard Marsh near Daggerford. Fresh caught boiled Delimbyr Crayfish on wild chives, coastal carrageen moss entrapping estuary brine shrimp (irish moss, dried brine shrimp), Brackish-Berries (blackberries), Blackened Dart-Frog legs (frog legs) on spring sprouts (clover sprouts), roasted bog bugs on a stick!
More images here. Discussion thread here.
Drow:
From top left: Menzoberranzan black truffle rothe cheese (Black Knight Tilsit), Donigarten Moss Snails (Escargot in shallot butter sauce), Blind cave fish caviar in mushroom caps (Lumpfish caviar), faerzress infused duck egg imported from the surface Realms (Century egg), Black velvet ear fungus (Auricularia Black Fungus Mushroom).
Drow will also eat A Fucking Rock if it’s goth enough
you know what im gonna reblog this to my main as well as my aesthetic blog because this post kicked my ass
Mods are asleep post forbidden tits
Huh
Huh
Huh
Hhhhhhh
Perfectly balanced as all things should be…
Ending of Carboys Theory
A saw a comment on youtube mention this and I have been obsessing over it for a while now.
First of all, if you haven’t seen the Carboys latest episode yet. check it out.
But the theory basically goes like this:
The ending we see before the credits and the ending we see after the credits are not the same ending. When they entered the time portal their timeline split in two creating two parallel realities. In the first reality (the one before the credits) Griffon and Nick are separated and spend eternity alone.
In this timeline Nick becomes Busto1.0. He knowingly sacrificed himself to save reality and upon becoming Bust1.0 he goes back to the time before this all to try to warn past Nick and Griffon about the dangers of the blob and prevent this all from happening.
In the very same timeline, Griffon wasn’t given a choice about sacrificing himself. (as learned in the second timeline) and as such never had a chance to say his goodbyes to his loved ones like Nick could. Stricken with this grief and loneliness Griffons chaotic side slowly eats away at him and turns him into Busto2.0.
If you recall to the fan-animation “Car Boys Animated - Some Sort of Digital Heaven” (which was stated by Polygon as being canon) at the end of it you see Busto2.0 opening his arms to welcome and embrace Busto1.0. That's Griffon being reunited with Nick.
Which leaves one finale question. Who or what is “Busto3.0” aka The Blob? Well little is known about the blob, but if following the pattern of how the Bustos are created, then it can be assumed that the Blob’s origins are similar. For starters lets talk about what we know about the blob. 1) It hates water. 2) its physics are fairly complex. 3) There are people who love it, and more specifically Griffon is one of the people who has to constantly fight against his love for The Blob.
Now then who fits all three of these points AND was brought into the time portal with Nick and Griffon? Ball. Ball would constantly spring out of any water it was put in. Ball has a very similar level of complexity to its physical properties. and Griffon absolutely loves ball. Both of them do. Everyone loves Ball. In fact it was Griffon’s love for Ball that created The Blob. When they were entering the time portal Griffon stated, “I’m scared, can I have Ball? I love ball! ” To which Nick complied and brought Ball (as well as The Blob) into the time portal thus damming them to a repeating cycle.
Ball was dragged into the portal and as a result ended up getting stuck their forever, Griffon didn’t like seeing Ball be trapped in forever and they were forced to leave ball behind. Thus, just like Nick and Griffon, Ball was left all alone for eternity thus forcing Ball to change into The Blob. Who only ever tried to reunite with the boys, but in its changed state, it ended up consuming everything.
After all, the Blob itself wouldn’t hurt the boys and as Griffon said “-if it detects malice… it will activate the protocols ” meaning it only attacked them when they attacked it first.
Now I could be looking into this too much, after all its a video game series about two good soft boys playing a physics based car game. But they did such an amazing job creating a whole story around this series, it only seems fitting we continue to honor it by having these overly complicated theories of our own.
TL;DR
Nick = Busto1.0
Griffon = Busto2.0
Ball = Blob